In this video, Curt from “Real Problems” has a chat with his cat Panda to discuss an array of heated political topics.

“Stimulating” does not even begin to describe the conversation you’re about to witness. Watch and discuss.

Stream it here:
The REAL Podcast (Episode 04)

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In this episode, we discuss Simon P’s REAL PROBLEM:
I keep going to Rite Aid because I really like the girl behind the counter.  She flirts with me a lot and I really think there’s something there. How do I know she’s ACTUALLY flirting or she’s just being nice because it’s her job?

… plus, What’s the advantage of taking vitamins?  Why are they necessary?

Jump on board!

The REAL Podcast (Episode 03)

Posted: April 2, 2011 by Joseph in Movies
Tags: , , ,

Stream it here:
The REAL Podcast (Episode 03)

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In this episode, we discuss:

The good, the bad and the unacceptable…
When did vampires get this lame?
What’s a hundred-year-old dude doing romancing high school girls?
Why do men cringe and the women binge?

“Twihard with a Vengeance”

C. Montgomery Burns: Origins

Posted: March 25, 2011 by REAL PROBLEMS in Domestic, Money
Tags: , , ,

Nice Mom- writes:

I asked my 17 year old son if I could borrow 200 dollars (just until I got to an ATM machine) and his response was no. What did I raise?  



You should beat this insolence out of him*.  Try to use glancing blows to not leave any marks.  He is 17 so he will (probably) know how to defend/counter attack.  Remember to stick, move, and work off the jab.   

If you are the non-violent type, than demand retroactive payment for food, clothing, and electricity for the past seventeen years.  The $200 dollars will be a down payment on the several thousand dollars you have coming to you.  If he refuses payment, tell him to take a hike.  If he refuses to leave, see the first paragraph.   

Good Luck

*in a legal manner of course.

The REAL Podcast (Episode 02)

Posted: March 23, 2011 by Joseph in Podcast
Tags: , , ,

Stream it here:
The REAL Podcast (Episode 02)

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In this episode, we discuss:

    Was the attack on the women justified? or is Ben Weasel out of his mind?
    What age do you need to hang it up?

Video of the Screeching Weasel incident:

The REAL Podcast (Episode 01)

Posted: March 19, 2011 by Joseph in Podcast
Tags: , , , ,

Our first podcast has been posted!

Stream it here:
The REAL Podcast (Episode 01)

Subscribe here:
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In this episode, we discuss many issues including:

    How will today’s youth grow up in an environment where porn is one Google search away?
    Is using your bare fists just a “thing of the past”?
    Sure you could tell someone to “go pound sand” as yourself, but isn’t it better to do it in character?
    Clearly the best record store of the 80s/90s.  It was all about the stickers.
  • MR. YUK
    Practical uses for everyone’s favorite poison sex symbol

Poor Me, Another Drink

Posted: March 15, 2011 by Harry in People, Relationships
Tags: , , , ,

learn when to pay a round – writes:
Hi, I have a problem. I enjoy going to the bars with my friends and I have a big problem with “cheap people” so I try not to be cheap. But, what do you do when you buy rounds of drinks, tip the bartender and try to make everyone happy and there is always one in the bunch who doesn’t reciprocate. I understand this is a “common” problem… but really..what do you do?

You simply stop buying rounds for people.  Sure this may make YOU look cheap, but it is better to be cheap and wealthy than generous and poor when it comes to buying drinks.  You aren’t running a charity; we’re talking about booze here, not polio vaccines for third world children.  Alcohol prices are ridiculously high at bars.  Why would anyone want to pay 5-10 dollars for a drink when they could stay at home and drink a quart of turpentine for $1.50?  It makes no economic sense!

If you MUST buy drinks for your friends and one person seems to never counter the favor, than you should call them out on it.  Say something that is polite and respectful but also firm, something like: “Hey you cheap piece of monkey sh*t!  Why don’t you pry your wallet out of that cheap ass of yours and buy me and my chums three fingers of scotch immediately!” A courteous statement like this should get your point across in a gentle fashion.

If the above is too nice for you and your friend persists on riding the free drink train, simply find out what it is they drink and when you order a round, replace your friend’s drink with a reasonable facsimile.  Here is a handy drink replacement chart that was developed for other nefarious purposes* but will work equally well here:

Rum and Coke = Coke

Gin and Tonic = Water with Lime

Vodka Cranberry = Cranberry Juice

Draught Beer = Ginger Ale

Screwdriver = Orange Juice

If your friend has the audacity to call you out on this switch, blame it on the bartender and tell your friend to take it up with him/her.  This should provide adequate amusement for you because your frugal friend will most likely be thrown out of the bar for trying to scam free drinks.


*REAL PROBLEMS pro scam: The drink conversion chart was developed for conning free drinks.  All you need to do is order one of the replacements for a drink you like and then keep an eye out for someone who is telling a story using exaggerated arm motions (Italians are usually good for this).  Stand very close to this person with your “drink” in hand, so that this person’s “it was this big” hand gesture knocks your “drink” out of your hand.  Most people will apologize and offer to buy you a new glass of whatever they think is on the floor.